Going Sane in a Crazy World

My journey through life and the lessons I learn to help me grow spiritually.

Sane Friends

Seminar

Since the humidity was climbing fast and I wasn't paying to put the AC on in my car. I headed over to the hotel to wait for the start of the seminar. After marking my territory in the room I sat and relaxed in the lobby and enjoyed my book.
My friend OVDC was there and we got to talk since I hadn't seen her in about 2 weeks. Running late my friend Peggy made it to the seminar. We went to school together and this is the second time I've seen her since we graduated 13 years ago. During breaks we took walks and caught up. I did get a good compliment from her. She asked what happen to me. I use to have boy shoulders and now I'm all broad shouldered. LOL. I was going to ask if she wanted to grab dinner to talk some more to catch up, but she was off to her family's place for dinner.

I tell you the seminar is good, but I can't do school anymore. I have about a 20 minute attention span to listen to lectures. The hands on stuff was easy and I absorb that like a sponge.
While I learned a lot of good information to help my patients get a lot better, I got two areas of healing done. The first is that I had a crush on Peggy when we were in school. She was just getting out of a bad marriage and was dating my ex. In the back of my mind she has always stayed stashed away. Talking to her this weekend that has disappeared. While I still like her and happy to have her as a friend, anything beyond that isn't for me.
The other was I ran into the guy I was suppose to buy and office from when I first moved to Virginia. He didn't want to add a non compete clause in the contract and then I started having problems with my lenders in taking so long that I cancelled the deal. Whatever bad blood that was still there was washed away which was nice.
The craziest part of the weekend was driving home on the interstate and a doe is trying to cross the highway. The middle of the day, not rutting season, and a busy highway. It was weird and it was scary as hell when I'm trying not to slam into her at 70 mph. Honking my horn got her back off the road, but she never froze like deer do. She just kept wandering.

Williamsburg


I got up early so I drove to Williamsburg hours before my seminar. I found out where everything was before heading over to Colonial Williamsburg and the Downtown area. They were having a farmer's market so I wandered around the area.
I checked out a lot of the stores. While I'm don't like colonial decor it was interesting to see some of the stores collectibles. The humidity was rising quickly so I headed off to the seminar.
After the seminar I headed back to finish looking around the area. It was really nice to just enjoy and relax. I miss vacations. It took me a while to realize what I liked about the area. I saw that the area has nature and the buildings intertwined so it gives a living feel. It was a pleasure to just sit there, breath in the area, and soak up the atmosphere.

Yankee Candle

Looking over the Williamsburg map I saw Yankee Candle marked on it. Now I know its a big place with the ladies, but I couldn't understand why it was on the map. Driving past it I found out why.
It's a 3 story place. Inside it's like Disney World. Different shops, kiosks, even a holiday section. I couldn't believe it. Yes this is inside the place. The ceiling was done to look like the sky. It was very cool.



I'm not a big candle person, but I figured I would pick up a vanilla scented something for the office. They didn't have any pure vanilla just mixed with other sweet stuff that was kind of sickening. So I passed.

Happy Hour

Since it was slow as anything yesterday I tried a few different avenues to build business. I submitted two articles to the local women's paper and headed over to one of the other alternative health offices in the area to see what they do. I always wonder if the average person can see the difference between health care and money making.
Anyway it was Happy Hour with the Singles last night. It was a fun time even though we had 50% attendance again. The food was good as was the conversation. There was a lot of new faces so it was nice to meet new people.
I was able to remove some more scar tissue from marriage last night which I wasn't expecting. The women were talking about how far they would go to date someone. I was like I'm not driving across the water (45 minutes). They asked why and I told them I didn't want to be driving all the time. Now this really surprised me. They said that if after a couple of dates you weren't taking turns that the person should be dumped. I really had to pick my jaw off the floor when I heard that. However I still have a lot of stuff from my ex and her lazy ass on doing her share.
The funny thing is that people are so surprised that I'm doing 2-3 events each week that I'm attending. Hey it's better than sitting at home. Oh yeah the really great thing is that several women want to hitch a ride when I go to NY to see Eric. Sharing the expenses would be great.

Bartenders & Sales Women

You know female bartenders and sales women know how to work it. I had a sales meeting this morning and was flashed so much I felt guilty for not stuffing dollar bills in her top. She's new so she's not polished yet to tie it all together. However I'm an old dog with this stuff and I knew I wasn't buying anything when she came. My point was using her for a possible new person in my networking group. However the time wasn't good for her so I set her up in a few others. Always happy to help others.

I finally got my subliminal self-esteem CD yesterday. It's been a long time since I went to bed with some kind of sound in the bedroom. My ex use to always had to have something playing whether it was the AC, fan, or sound machine. I tell you it really made me dream. While the dreams weren't self-esteem builders and I can't remember them now. I knew I was dreaming all night long. When I awoke I didn't feel any different, but I have to admit this afternoon I feel more solid if that makes sense.

Hump Night

Well I was able to score some last minute free tickets to the Funny Bone. What is really funny is that tickets cost $10, but I will probably never pay to go there. Why? Because I have never paid to go there. In 2-3 years I've always gone for free and it would just be too weird to actually pay for admission. While I pay the same price for comedy improv each month and I don't blink an eye.

Anyway only one other person showed up. It was her first event, so it was fun talking to her. I had seen the first 2 comedians before, but I really wanted to see the main guy. Why? Well he has cerebral palsy. I figured either he is really good or he's gonna suck big time. He was hilarious. The only downer of the whole show was this one chick up in the front. I would like to say she was drunk, but she was just an asshole. I was really surprised management didn't say anything because enough of the crowd was.

The Deed is Done

In my work for further emotional growth I applied. Like I've previously stated as the organizer for the Singles group I get a lot of email from places. Well today our local magazine contacted me for applicants for their Sensational Singles issue. Old me would have been, "I don't know," new me was like, "this should be fun." So we'll see what happens. I have nothing to lose and all to gain.

Perks

One thing I have a hard time wrapping my mind around is this concept that people want to get in front of me. As a chiropractor I have a line around the corner of supplement people wanting to sign me up for their product and sell their wares for them. I've guinea pigged many of them and actually found out that I'm allergic to aloe. I have to admit I would rather get the pens, pads, clocks, etc from the pharmacy companies. At least I have use for the stuff. I hate finding a new supplement person and the look in their eyes when they find out who I am. It's like I'm a 12 buck deer and its deer season.

On the other hand I do enjoy businesses looking for the singles group dollars. While they aren't comping me anything they do make my job easier on finding things to do. Case in point is a hotel in P-town is offering us a bunch of stuff for the group to come. Where are all the bribes I hear about?

Riding the Waves

Its' been an up and down type day and as always it's my attitudes.

Yes pigs are flying here right now. After calling every month for the last 2 years Aetna insurance finally has an opening for a chiropractor. It's the only insurance I don't have in the area. I know a few of my patients will be very happy when I get on. Hey I know I'm excited as hell. I even had to ask the lady twice to make sure their was an opening for chiropractors. It was like a round peg in a square hole.

What other fun has happened today. Spa girl showed up for some treatment. I really didn't listen to a lot of what she had to say since it was just drama in her life that I've heard before. I gave her some advice that she asked for. Couple of things I realized today with her. One is that she has breasts implants. She's lost weight and those puppies actually look bigger now which I know is physically impossible. The other is that she doesn't get that I'm doing something out of the goodness of my heart and not looking for anything in return. She's a person with a problem that I can help with and if some point she can pass the gift onto someone else that will be great.

Dealing with a complaint with my business group with one member screwing over another. While I would rather not deal with this kind of crap I'm not shrinking away from it which is step in a good direction for me.

I had a huge wave of where the hell is the money with a few days left in the month. I need at least 1 of 4 checks to arrive which will pay most of my bills. I may need to pull a ougie board out to find out where they are.

My Blue Ball

The singles and I went bowling today. I always forget how fun it is. I had a big shiny blue ball, I only needed another to have pair. Always enjoy putting me feet into shoes that have seen more in and out traffic than a crack whore's hoo-ha. The last ingredient is hanging with some nice people.

It was a little group than normal, but I enjoyed talking with everyone. I do find myself a little attracted to the Marketer. When I tried to see what the attraction was since she is different than my usual type. I could see it was like the Hiker yesterday who I liked. Both seem to have solid single lives which is important. My mind is finally calming down on my sabbatical from dating. I'm having a lot of fun just meeting people and doing things. I have to admit that this is the first Memorial Day weekend that I had a full calendar and it felt good.

Everyone is happy with all the events. I just wish I had some more help so that we could have even more things going on. Hey if you have to do something why not do it great.

The Luck of the Irish

TK Kerouac reminded me the other day of luck after I wished her good luck on her night out. It's old thinking, something I'm working hard to remove at the moment. It has nothing to do with scoring or not getting into an accident which I hope didn't happen. It's just the old vestiges of how I use to think, that my life was at the whims of fate. Growing up I was the pawn in my care givers sick games. Constantly having my needs over-looked and learning from people also in ships lost at sea didn't help.

It's the attitudinal changes that are removing the "luck" from my life and allowing me to hold the rudder and steer my life where I want it to go. Happiness is a daily choice that I learned to make on a daily basis. Luck has nothing to do with it.

My Marriage Sign


Nuff said.

I've Been Cured

OMG I'm dying. We had country cured ham for dinner tonight. I would have had less salt if I just sucked down all the salt in the shaker. I knew it would be bad when the Landlord said it was salty. Salting my food is a rare thing and is usually reserved for salad. I can feel the pile of salt sitting and burning a hole in the bottom of my stomach. In an attempt not to wake up a dessicated mass in the morning I'm downing the water as fast as I can.

Today the singles and I saw Indiana Jones at the Commodore theater. I think this was the very first event that everyone who said they were coming, came. What did you know Virginia there is a Santa Claus. We had some Commodore virgins which is always fun as the ooo and aaa about the place. Hey it's the Commodore. Since we had the routine down from last time their was no problem with Frau Blooker in the ticket booth. It was like visiting the Soup Nazi. We paid and took a step to the left and waited.

The movie was good and I'll put it above Temple of Doom, but Raiders and Lost Crusade still beat it. Afterwards we walked down the street to get a drink. Sorry no pics.

Strawberry Fields Forever

Today the singles and I went to the Strawberry Festival. However last night was like rats off a sinking ship. We lost like have the RSVP's for it. Only one person showed. Another woman got their late and couldn't find us. She told me she didn't have a fun time. I find this hard to believe. 125,000 people go to this festival each year over the 2 days. There is so much to do. I know since I use to go alone. I guess she got stuck on if she couldn't find us it was a bad thing. Oh well.
The weather was great. Pure blue skies, 70 degrees, and a light breeze to keep you comfortable. The pig races are always great to see, especially when there swimming. I'm always amazed to watch the piglets play the piano. It was behind the gate from where I was standing so I couldn't grab a picture of it.
We looked for the strawberry tacos, but couldn't find them. Everyone always looks at me strange when I say I don't like strawberries at the strawberry festival. Hey I still enjoy it. I did get a great sign made for my office so my day was made.

Pungo where the festival is all the was down south in the city. A real rural area which is pretty to drive through with its golden fields of wheat.

Lost Prince of Atlantis

When I go to the gym it's the time of the seniors and stay at home moms. So the men's locker room is made of up of slow moving old men. Although I have to admit they are pretty good about good about clearing out quickly so you can use the lockers. Enter Pool Man, Lost Prince of Atlantis. I say this because when he comes out of the pool he has so much gear on it's too funny. Floaty belt, headgear, water aerobics weights, etc. He just needs a giant sea horse and he'd be all set.
Now the point of this story isn't that he looks incredibly foolish. Hey it adds some humor to my day as well as a distraction to all the dried up prune men of the locker room. The point is that he is slower than molasses in January in the Artic circle when it's 80 below. For some reason he now likes the area that I use. Now this happens with others, but its not a problem. The problem with Pool man is after he takes off his cape, cowl, and utility belt he moves like a fuckin' slug. No joke taking off pool attire to getting dressed is at least 20 minutes. With him taking up so much space and time it's like grid lock in the locker room. Pool man needs to go back to Atlantis or come at a different time.

OMG I Can't Believe It

Yes this morning I got my first spam text message. Unfucking-believable! Even more so since I found out yesterday that I pay for incoming text also. BASTARDS!

Should I Stay or Should I Go

Early this morning I got the call from my Mom's residence to give them a call, this is never a good sign. When she was still walking it was usually that she fell and bumped into something. Although once they called to tell me she got into a fight with another resident. Mom gave better than she got. Go Mom. However since being wheelchair bound I rarely get calls.

Anyway this morning's call was to say that she had 103 temperature. They were starting her on antibiotics and a chest x-ray and blood work was ordered. All this is a mixed bag of nuts for me. On one hand I'm waiting for the day for her to go. Some people look at me strange when I say this, but then I know they have never experienced losing a parent and still having them alive. My Mom disappeared 2 years ago and I have a pod person to visit now, take for strolls, and do her nails. However when these episodes come up the pain of possible loss is still there. I guess its something you truly can't prepare for no matter how much you would like it to happen.

Well by the end of the day all the test are in and are pretty normal, she' son medicine, and fever is gone. Now the wait for the next crisis.

The Manchurian Candidate

Well still working to reprogram myself for success. For the last 8 months I've been wanting to update my prayers, meditations, and affirmations. Well this week I finally got off my ass to update them for the times. Now I have different affirmations for each day dealing with different aspects. I almost had to laugh doing the wealth and prosperity one. I couldn't say a few, it was that difficult. So after a few repetions I was able to get them out, so at least I know I'm on the right track.

Today I'm working on changing my negative streak. While I can do an accomplish a lot for others since it is tied in with acceptance and love. I have a harder time with a longer time line with myself. So I'm trying to look at it in a different light. Since when doing it for others it's for love and acceptance why can't it be the same for me. I know I could use more self love here.

The rest is catching all the little negative phrases I spout out and repeating it with something positive. Years ago I remember it took me a while to get rid of "life's a bitch and then you (marry one and) die". It's usually my standard of myself if I slip and say it again. I know I'm on the wrong track.

On another note Spa girl fell off the face of the earth again. I expected as much, but I will still keep to my values.

Game Night

Game night went very well. We had a lot of people cancel at the last moment so it was a smaller crowd than usual, but it worked out well. The new Starbucks liked us a lot so it worked out well. I'm starting to see the main crowd of the group since they attend almost everything. The women are doing well with starting friendships and doing other activities.
My latest acquisition went over really well Zombango. It ask great questions like would you rather a cup of toe jam or drink a bathtub full of dirty bathwater. You know the big questions of our time.

It's funny I need my Palm to keep everyone informed of when the next event is.

What's Up With the Men?

Over the pass few weeks with the singles I've met a bunch of guys. I would say half of them plus a few I've met around have really long nose hair. What's up with that? I can't concentrate on what your saying when your nose hair is blowing in the breeze. Especially when one of those long suckers whips me. Invest in a little trimmer and get rid of that. I think the nose hairs age you about 20 years.

On the subject of men I got another issue of Men's Vogue. Looking through it, to hopefully get some ideas for my prosperity map, I found out what's wrong with me. If this magazine is to be believed. I found out that I don't look gay enough nor do I have a obsession with watches. Watch ads far surpassed all other advertisers. I must have missed that memo at the monthly men's meeting. I must have been scratching at that time. A watch just tells time and maybe how many atmosphere's your at, like you'll ever get that answer on Jeopardy. Hell if it gave blow jobs I could see all the attention. However I forgot the other problem. You have to look really gay,whether you have to actually be is unknown (not that there is anything wrong with it). Just the look isn't for me nor do I want to carry around a fire extinguisher to keep down my "flaming".

All This Money & No Where to Spend It

One thing I have always known about myself is that I lack vision. While I have a great imagination and if you give me the basic building blocks I can run with it light years. However pulling shit out of my ass, I have no clue.

As I continue on this journey to help myself with this poverty mentality I've been doing a lot of reading and as always taking actions to follow up. Before I started recovery a long time ago I use to love to play in to open area. Boundaries? We don't need no stinkin' boundaries. Over the years I've come to see how helpful they are. So yesterday I started setting up better boundaries with work and myself. I've now scheduled myself an actual lunch hour and I'll keep my leisure activities confined to then. Whether I have patients or not I'll keep focused on working on some aspect of business whether it be learning or putting new things to work.

Anyway the point of this entry was that I'm trying to do a Prosperity Manifestation Map. ROFLMAO! I can have anything I want on here and I'm coming up blank. I've gotten so use to wanting so little that now to reach for the stars is almost impossible. I'll have to ask my 9 year old he probably give me a list a mile long.

You Must Remember This

Of all the office in the world she had to walk into mine. Since the afternoon was light I headed out to Barnes & Noble to do some more research on Poverty Mentality. How this is going I will make a separate entry. I wasn't planning on heading back to office, but I was getting hungry and still had time before I headed off to meet friends. So who just happens to walk in my door?

Spa girl walked in. I wasn't to surprised since I knew at some point she would walk in. It was interesting seeing her and catching up. I see her differently than I did 6 months ago. Jeez has it been that long since we kissed and she fell off the face of the earth. She had hurt her back a while ago so I offered to help. Most likely this was all orchestrated, but I did it to help another person. So I'll keep it friends this time if she can keep up with that.

Miniature Golf

I haven't played miniature golf since I was married. It's a lot more fun when your not with your ex I found out. I tell you I don't know how someone does 18 holes of real golf. 18 holes of putt-putt was good enough of me. Boy did we have a blast. Balls flying off the course and anything else you can think of.

We all had a fun time then grabbed some Mexican food and margaritas to relax. Someone knew of a place with a patio so we could be outside. I tell you afterwards I was ready for a siesta.


I was happy hear people say every time they open their email there's more events.

Poverty Mentality

My brother and I talk on this topic frequently and how it colors our world. I was reminded about this topic Friday when I stopped by Barnes & Nobles. I ran into CPA man. We shook hands and said a few words before heading along our merry way. Afterwards I was in a good mood from having met him. When I thought about why its because I put him in a higher status than myself. He's well connected through the community, etc. When I thought about it I realized we sort of run in the same circles. While he has many more years experience in it I'm doing pretty well for my short time. So it comes down to me always looking through the expensive store window at the world that I believe is beyond me.

it's all crap I know, but boy is it hard to erase. When I think back to childhood I don't remember thinking poor, but I never compared myself to others. Talking to people now and hearing about all the family vacations and I'm like what are those? I didn't start those till I was married. Big Wheels and normal kids board games were great at my friends houses, but escaped me.

So as always when I have a problem I talk about it. I see the flow start to happen when I do. Case in point is the Art show I did yesterday with the Singles. Only 2 other people showed up which I didn't care since I was doing it anyway. Anyway one of the guys kept having to look at his Blackberry. All my of business colleagues have them. Again I see them as something beyond me like a Ferrari. However I have a Palm and a cell phone. It would be great to have 1 item instead of 2 especially with summer on us. I can't believe how I limit myself with options just because I think they are beyond me.

I looked at upgrading my phone to something that would combine my Palm and phone, but nothing will allow me to get it without either paying several hundred dollars for the phone or an extra $30 for web services that I don't need on the phone. At least now I have options which I am grateful for.

When Pigs Fly

When I'm bored, I'll usually peruse the news articles to keep myself amused. Today I found myself reading about wardrobe mistakes during the summer. Since I work alone this is a nice thing to see how the rest of the country's workplaces are. While I totally agree about not wearing flip flops with a suit and yes I would say that is a firing offense. Come on are you completely insane?

However this next one was like, oh yeah I see a lot of complaints for this. Not!

"If a colleague is revealing too much at work, approach it carefully by saying, "I'm sure you didn't notice, but your cleavage is showing."
Oh yeah I see a lot of guys getting in line to complain about this one. Maybe standing in line to see the offense, but saying something against it. LMAO! Unless your working in a church a little glimpse of flesh keeps your will to live up while working in a carpeted box.

You Don't Talk About Fight Club

I see the police department is talking about me. How do I know this? Well the Sheriff's department calls me and this guy is new and tells me I'm on there referral list. After they tell me to calm down which I am. If there was a problem they would have probably kicked in my door and swarmed in here with a SWAT unit. Anyway they want money and since I give to the local police force they wanted there share. Sorry pal I got double reamed on that already since their really spreading the word this year.

On other news I do want to thank the Dating Goddess for her latest entry about relationship recovery time. I always know I need something between the women I date, but I never had a hard and fast number. I tried taking some time after Law girl, but it was not enough and I'm paying the price now. I feel like a Venus flytrap. I'm happy in my life just sitting there, but once a woman comes near, I'm lit. The countdown starts and my mind is already working on how to ask her out. It's not optional at the moment and I don't like being in that place. Hey I knew what I was doing and I thought I could play with fire and not get burnt. Well now I need to let the healing begin.

A Scent of a Woman

Hanging out with the Singles crowd one guy said how great an old girlfriend smelled that he still can remember it 20 years later. Scent is such a powerful thing and my friend Paul and I know we are suckers for the scent of Suave shampoo in a woman's hair. It is such a nice scent.

However in talking scents, I remember learning that in early man times scent was used to differentiate which clan you belonged to. I remember when I was in high school when I had a run in with this. I use to have a girl sit next to me most of the time since we were in alphabetical order. Pretty girl, but her scent was just noxious to me. Now it was not BO, however it really always made me want to move away from her.

I really haven't had such a strong reaction until now, what 25-30 years later. I have a female patient that is very attractive, but her scent really just makes me want to move away from her. Again I know it's not BO and I can't say its a bad scent, but it does cause a reaction in me.

Anyone else? Beuller?

Unplugged Japanese Style

World Cuisine Japan went very well last night. I was very surprised that the restaurant was so crowded for a Wednesday, but the food is great and that's why I picked the place. It was nice to see familiar faces and some new ones. I really did feel bad for the staff since half of the group dribbled in late and I had to keep asking for a bigger table. It was almost like the Seinfeld episode with her telling me it would be 5 more minutes with each change.

The group broke down into 2 eating preferences, sushi and non raw fish. I was part of the sushi crowd and we swapped different pieces like kids on a playground. On of the guys didn't see the wasabi in his meal and just popped the huge wad in his mouth. I thought he was going to die.


Afterwards most of us headed over to Starbucks for a game of Flux and drinks. This Starbucks is now open later than my usual so I changed our next game night to there.

I have to admit when I got home I was disturbed from the night and I didn't know why. The event was a success, the food was great, everyone enjoyed themselves, and the women all made great connections with each other. That was it. While the women started friendships and I didn't. Yes I can be a 5 year old since I didn't get a friendship. It always amazes me how petty I can be. Once I realized this I was okay and the disturbance passed. The guys there last night while I'm happy to see are not people I feel I can make a friendship with.

Holy Hell!!!!

I can't believe I just paid for gas that was .30 higher than it was 7 days ago. I agree they should have porn playing on the gas pumps so at least I can enjoy being fucked. Unbelievable.

Puny Jedi

I'm not a big new person on here, but this caught my eye. In England, the Jedi are a recognized religion. Who knew? Anyway I'm trying to write this while laughing hysterically. This one guy got really drunk and dressed as Darth Vader and attacked the Jedi in their church. It was caught on film since it was used in court. Now that would be a classic Youtube video. Oh I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall to watch some drunk Darth Vader break into the Jedi church screaming "death to the jedis" and lay into them. It must have been priceless. This is probably what it looked like afterwards.


Hey I'm the Boss

Today is one of those days when I'm happy that I'm the boss. For the first time in many days the weather is nice and I was too lazy to do any ironing so it became casual Wednesday at the office. Some of my patients will joke with me about taking it easy today and it's the truth. I'm very comfortable in jeans and sneakers.


I had asked everyone in the singles group if they wanted to host an event which was just greeting everyone who came and let me know who came. I can't be every place and this is the time when their are tons of activities going on. I was going to rant and tell them all to "fuck off" the next time they complained about events, but a bunch of people came through this morning. Actually no one stepped up to the plate on anything I suggested, but 2 people did offer alternative events which I'm good with.
I'm looking forward to sushi tonight with the singles. For some reason a bunch of the women just bowed out. I don't know if it was because the only men were myself and a 62 year old man. I know some women are really gun-ho about finding a guy that they cut their nose despite themselves. Who knows?

Tuesday Thoughts

I'm tired today, so much so that people have said so. Now that's really weird. I've slept good over the last few days. Even though I have been active it hasn't been extreme. So I really have no answer. Can it be (gasp!) that I'm getting old and slowing down. I really don't know if I could handle that. Honestly I've always been an active guy so not being able to stay at a certain level would be a big blow. Hopefully it's from when I whacked my head Sunday and will be gone in a day or two.

I have to admit I did get some evil satisfaction after I thanked (the only person) who showed up at the block party Friday. He really thanked me for getting a free steak. He was still blown away. Everyone elses face showed the "oh crap" if forgot face. Sucks to be them.

I wonder if comments were made Saturday at Eric's communion party. Not that I would expect any from the drunken mess, but I haven't heard from him since then. We had talked about talking Sunday and I tried last night. So somethings up. And these are the days of our lives.

Social Butterfly

As I mark my calendar I see I'm becoming a social butterfly. Who would have thunk? I'm scheduling at least 3 events a week for the singles. I'm trying to give a wide variety of stuff that I would enjoy doing since I have to be there since no one else has stepped up to the plate. Besides finding another happy hour place I'm set for next month. Even with seminars and Eric coming to visit its a pretty busy month of kayaking, wine, museums, jazz, games, etc. As with any group I'm seeing the people that will come out and the closet members that will never leave the comfort of their monitor.
I have to admit that most of the people in the group are introverts. It maybe why their in the group. Getting out and doing stuff just maybe too hard for them. However I'm starting to make friends which is big for me since I really don't have any here. I have to admit that friends have a higher priority than dating since they most likely will last longer. Pretty much since I graduated 13 years ago most of my friends scattered to the far ends of the country and friends in close physical proximity has been very lean.

I Feel the Need

I feel the need to date and its been pestering me for a week now. However I never want to date when I have the "need" for it. For me that translates to "if I had a woman in my life I would be happy" or "something is missing from my life." Happiness begins and ends with me. As always money is light, but that is nothing new in my life. With the singles group I'm very social at least 3 times a week. So what's the problem? I know it is me in that I have for most of my life looked for happiness outside of myself. Over the last 8 years I have turned that around, but when dating doesn't work out for some reason it seems to fan the flames of my "need" to date.

As a day goes by I'm good, but soon as a woman I like comes into view my mind is already working. Hey she could be in the car next to me. So until dating becomes optional again in my mind I'll hold off since I know I make better decisions when my head is on straight.

On a side note a regret has been coming up for me. This past weekend was Eric's communion. Due to money I didn't attend even though spending time with my ex's whole family won't have been like being circumcised with a spoon.

After it happened and I realized I couldn't get Eric back here I knew I made my last and bigger mistakes. Throughout my marriage I always did things to make it easier for my ex and I would pay for it in one way or another. Well this one I'm still paying for and I guess I always will while Eric is a child. It may change when he's 13 and can say where he wants to live. However I see so many divorced people living close by exchanging their kids for week long visits. So I've been hard on myself of late on how much of Eric's life I have missed due to my mistake.

Pay Dirt


Problems in your relationship with your guy. Well this here is gold from a woman's point of view and I'm a guy.

Mother's Day

Like Father's Day this is almost a non day for me. It's hard to see my Mom as she declines. Something else must of happened since her left hand seems weak now. I was happy to see that she had some gross use of her right hand. She did look nice today. The staff had dressed her nice for the holiday. I had picked up some hot pink nail polish for her. My Mom seems to like the flashy colors in her old age. So I did her nails and had a Snickers bar for her since they don't always have chocolate chip cookies there. I know my Mom and she is not one to pass up on the sweets. I wasn't able to contact my brother and family so their was no connection for her on that end.

The rest of the day has been relaxing. I've written a lot today which is surprising. Although it's nice to look at all that I have accomplished so far. Now I'm just hanging until Comedy Improv later tonight.

Talking with my Landlord last night and he said Single might be leaving us. Truly I don't care since I think she is more of a problem than she is worth which is something my Landlord is realizing. On a long enough time line her ways will cause a fire or some other disaster in the house. I was surprised with my Landlord's choices of what to do if she leaves:

1) Just be him and me which I have no complaints with
2) All guy house which isn't too bad. The guys that have stayed in the past have kept to themselves and been no problems.
3) I was surprised that finding another parent with a child was on the bottom of the list. He stated that he thought the generational gap was becoming too much of a problem and that we've had this long string of problem mothers.

So we'll see. I was waiting for it to happen, but utilities will be going up for us. It sucks, but with everything else sky rocketing it had to happen.

Go Speed Racer Go

All and all it was a busy day. I though hiking would have been a wash out since the pouring rain woke me up this morning, but it turned out nice. Our fearless leader Walk Girl didn't show so M2 and myself did the hike. It was a nice trail along the inner waterways. I forgot my camera so no pics sorry. It was really interesting at one point the area is completely overgrown with Spanish moss. We grabbed Subway like usual. Our slow employee was no where to be seen this week which was a blessing.
I had one emergency patient before I headed over to meet the Singles and Speed Racer the movie. I was a big fan of it as a kid so I really wanted to see this live action movie. I had to admit they did a really good job of adapting. The casting was pretty dead on except Sprockets. Mom Racer who never existed in the cartoon added some nice touches to the movie. I would have to say if racing was like this in real life I would watch it more often.

The Yin & Yang of Living

IN my adult life I've always needed at least either work of home life to be stable. Through turmoil of marriage at time both places were trouble and I had no place to hide. When that happens I have problems since I can't meet my needs of happiness or at least survival.

What's the point you say? Well even though I can't afford it I would still like to have my own place. However like I was commenting on Travistee's blog about growing up and changing perspectives. Since I have never really lived by myself except dorm life and the few months after I spit from my ex. I would like to experience it in a better situation. However I see how I am when the house is empty now. While I enjoy blasting my music and being naked. It does lose its charm quickly. I like having someone in the house and I feel very unconnected when no one is around. Talk over dinner is a favorite of mine. I know a lot of this is because I am alone throughout the day. My patients are my social life, but they come and go and their is a different level of camaraderie.

While hiking this morning I talked about how I no longer want a place with property. While it looks great I no longer want the responsibility for taking care of it. My responsibilities are elsewhere and I don't want anymore. Like many single mom's who date that want a man to make the plans since they are tired of doing it in all other aspects of their life.

I Wish I was a Hamster

Please someone just roll me over. We had our monthly block party today and Outback said they wanted to cater it. Who were we to complain. Nice juicy steaks, chicken, and salad. It was delicious. I really wish I could of stored more in my cheeks to have later. The really funny thing is that I'm trying to invite people and their like "no thanks". Free food from Outback! Are you completely mental to be passing this up? We had a really good turnout and met some new neighbors which is always fun. A couple of my patients came and they met some old friends which was really nice.

The Dating Goddess had an entry about Mandarin Ducks, Feng Shui, and finding love. So I figured what the hey I'll get a pair of Ebay cheap. So I finally got them today. Their cute, but hey aren't they both male ducks. This doesn't bode well. Does anyone have any lesbian ducks to make a trade?

Date Ending

Reading all the blogs that I read, their seems to be a theme of getting out of bad dates. While I have read some creative ones to a few duds. I will share with you here the best one that I was given when I first started dating. It was not invoked, but sent to help out as I made my was in the dating world again. If you would like a copy to print up let me know.

What the fine print says:


THE LEMON LAW MAY BE INVOKED IF, AT ANY POINT DURING THE INITIAL FIVE MINUTES (300 SECONDS) OF A FIRST DATE, EITHER PARTY DEEMS THE UNION HOPELESS AND ELECTS TO ABORT SAID DATE IN THE INTEREST OF TIME AND/OR SELF-RESPECT. RECEIPT OF THIS CARD HEREBY ABSOLVES THE GIVER FROM ANY “HARD FEELINGS” OR “QUESTIONS” FROM THE LEMON LAWYEE RELEVANT TO THE DISCONTINUANCE OF THE DATE, WHICH MAY BE TERMINATED FOR ANY REASON INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO: TAWDRY ATTIRE, BREATH, HOMELINESS, MISPLACED/EXCESSIVE BODY HAIR, PUBLIC SCHOOL EDUCATION, BAD CREDIT, NO CREDIT, SUSPICIOUS ODOR(S).

ADDENDA
(I) GIVER MAY WAIVE THE LEMON LAW SHOULD LEMON LAWYEE IMMEDIATELY CONSENT TO A NO-STRINGS ATTACHED “STAND,” DURATION OF WHICH SHALL BE NO LONGER THAN ONE (1) NIGHT.
(II) THE TERMS OF THE AGREEMENT ARE NON-EXCLUSIVELY TRANSFERABLE, IN DIFFERENCE TO THE EMERGENCE OF THE LEMON LAW AS A “THING.”
(III) IN THE UNLIKELY EVENT OF A SIMULTANEOUS INVOCATION, PARTIES SHALL ENACT ONE (1) “HIGH FIVE,” WITH NEITHER PARTY OFFICIALLY ASSUMING CREDIT FOR THE LEMON LAW ISSUANCE.

Game Night

Game Night has become the #1 event since it's the most well attended. As always it's a lot of fun and we've had to split into 2 groups. One of the games we played was Battle of the Sexes. What's interesting about the game is that the men's subjects breakdown like this: 80% sports, 15% drinking, and 5% tools. While the women's categories run the whole gambit. They kicked our butt.

It is interesting there is 2 camps in the group. Those looking for dates and those for friends. I fall into the latter since it is a lot harder to find friends than dates. I have to admit I don't miss salsa. While the dancing was fun I enjoy hanging out better with people my own age.

This morning when I went to get treated at my friend's I helped an old man change his tire. He hit the curb although he told me he caught some air. By the bent axle I could tell he really whacked it. My good deed for the day.

Like Corraling Cats


Now even my business group is becoming a pain with trying to get them all to participate. They all whine that they want business, but when it comes time to do the work jeez the run to the hills. I'm half Sicilian so I say just bust few knee caps to stimulate some business. However no one else seems to have my fiery desire. The rest of the leadership is happy to have me be the heavy which I don't mind. Hey someone has to do it. Everyone likes the results, but boy if you give them an inch they will run with it. I'll be happy when my term is over although I fear for the group with whoever follows since everyone else is a softy.

Whew

Hey it's 4:30 and I'm finally getting a chance to rest. Just a busy day today. I've only seen 1 patient so far though. Just business meeting, lecture, educational seminar, and now back here to finish up the day. With my business meeting I really have to ask, "is there anything that I don't do?" I just found out I have even more responsibilities today. Oye. Oh well more ass to kick. It's funny everyone knows any tough love coming from above has started with me. Honestly I don't know who will take the position after me since no one else is a hard ass like me. I shudder to think what will happen, but hey I don't want this position forever.

I was happy that people showed up for my lecture today. Doing lectures you get use to standing in an empty room. So I was happy when 3 people showed up. They were all surprised that more didn't show. Little did they know. However I really like doing them and teaching people how to be more healthy.

Did I tell you I'm still getting offers to date. WTF? I still don't want to date until I have enough saved up for Eric and the summer since that is my number one priority at the moment. It's just so ironic that as soon as I stop it seems to be open season on me.

Playing Taps

"You don't understand! I could've had class. I could've been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am." ~ On the Waterfront

There comes a time in every man's life when he has to admit he didn't live up to the potential he thought he had. That deadlines pass and you wonder where all the time went. Maybe you think if you just planned better or just had one night of glory it could make it all balance out. Atlas that is not to be. Yes 3 condoms are going in the garbage, their expiration date has passed. I really hate waste.

A Priest & a Rabbi Walk into ....

I tell you it's like a sick joke like when your married you get hit on more than when your single. Now that I've put dating on hold for a while to kind of clear my head and save some money also, I get offers. The two women online over the weekend I guess were the beginning. This morning in the gym a woman I've seen in there before who is attractive, ends up starting a conversation with me. I had the open to ask her out, but I bowed out of it. Life is always a test to see if you will stand by your decisions.

This week is a slow one here at the office. Last week looked to be slow and turned around so here's hoping that will happen again this week. I do have a lecture tomorrow across the street. I asked for people to RSVP. I was starting to worry, but my first one just came through.

Shut Your Pie Hole!

So you know this is a ranting entry. If you don't want to listen move on to the next entry.

Once a week at least I get a email from someone in the Singles group up on the Peninsula complaining that they don't have anymore events up there. They are no longer the golden children of the group. Now they know how it feels to be the step bastard children. What really gets me is the usual of people wanting the benefits without doing any work. My response is a put up or shut up type answer in a nice way. I have yet have anyone step up to the plate to help out nor have I gotten a second email from them.

While I'm ranting I might as well ask WTF happen to my alerts to comments. I figured no one was reading anymore and then I happen to scroll down my blog and their are all these comments that I have no idea about. I know this a free service, but WTF get with the program. This is worse than the spellchecker being broken for a few weeks.

Lastly what is up with the word verifications? I know the reason we have them since the second comment on this blog was spam. However the word verifications are becoming so difficult to read it's taking me at least a minute to figure out WTH it says. This is probably becoming the child proof caps of the 21st century. We can't figure them out, but the span computers are having no problem.

Iron Man

I have to admit that my Mom is not remembering me as much when I see her. With gas prices as high as they are I only visit her once a week. She's just not that interactive these days. So the length between visits I think is beyond her. It does take her a while to remember me, although today I don't think she did. I knew she knew I was familiar, but not who I was. It's hard to parent your parent.

Anyway I had a event today to see Iron Man at the Commodore Theater. It's a great old theater with and awesome THX sound system and a big screen. Most everyone had never been there before so it was a fun experience. The Stylist and Bizarro got their way early. The rest of the group was outside waiting until Bizarro came out and got us. The box office was really anal about seating, but we were able to sit next to them so it worked out. I guess that's why it's important to follow instructions. I can't figure Bizarro out. He's talked like he wanted to run the group in the past, but I've never heard that from others. Also when people were asked to step up to the plate he didn't do it. He just might be really anal I don't know. However my instincts tell me he will be a thorn in my side.

The movie was great and I highly recommend it. Downey was born to play the role. Everyone (except Bizarro) had fun and thanked me for scheduling so many events. The new guy told me I had the most active group out there. That was nice to hear especially since I'm still doing it by myself.


The great thing is that Indiana Jones and Batman are going to be there. So I know there are 2 events right there. Now I just need to find out where Speed Racer is playing.


The truly funny thing is that I've done a lot of online dating this year and through all of that I never received one real email from any women. I'm out of dating one week and one of my profiles must still be active and I got not one, but two emails from interested women. WTF? It's Murphy's Law. Neither one was what I was looking for and I'm happy being single at the moment.

Beach Bum

I'm beat as only you can from going to the beach. Small turn out for a hike this morning, but the weather was great and their was a nice coastal breeze to keep us comfortable. We walked as far as we could. It was funny since today we walked in to Fort Story. We got to one part were they were building a pier and a roadway to the it over the sand. Since we were on their property we weren't quite sure if we could pass. There was a guard there so I asked him. On the third shout he finally realized someone was calling him. He was like sure go right ahead. We asked what they were doing and he had no clue. LOL. Ah the army's finest. What was even funnier was that on the way back his superior was there with him and he was like you can't cross. I was like we just need to get back to our car since we walked over it already. He let us do so before chewing the guard out about letting people wander around.
We did our usual Subway lunch afterwards. OMG! It took about 30 minutes before someone took my order. The 2 guys behind the counter were slow as molasses in January. The line was huge. It was like something out of a comedy movie.
So I set up our Happy Hour this month at Keagan's. I was really happy to get up set up on the patio. Everybody wanted to be outside last month so I made it happen this time. Hopefully a bunch of people come again.

Lunch Time Fun

I rarely do fancy lunches, mostly because I don't think their worth the money. However it was a beautiful day and I had a small gift certificate left over for Guadalajara's. It's family started restaurant chain started here. They just opened one up in Town Center and that was the closest one to the rest of my errands so I decided to try it out. It's much fancier than the others which almost have a family restaurant feel. This felt like big city eating and I left with a full tummy. Still it was more than I would pay for lunch even with the gift certificate. However it was a such nice place I think I might make that the next Happy Hour place for the Singles group.

I see I'm going into feast or famine with the office. While this week turned out to be one of my best in a while. I have only like 3 appointments in the book for next week. I don't like that. However most of my patients go on maintenance this week. So their is a lot of praying for new patients going on with the occasional Native American dance going also cause it can't hurt.

Home Life

As I've stated before my room mate Single is lazy and if to be perfectly blunt not the brightest bulb in the box. The last time our Landlord went away she left dishes in the sink and crap around the place until the day he came back. Well last night she came back with a friend and they baked. So this morning when I got up the sink was full and stuff was all over the counters in stacks. Hopefully when she gets up she will clean. If not I might be stacking all this crap in her room. I'm not cleaning up behind her and I also live there so I need access to stuff. We'll see.
It looks like we have a big crowd to go hiking tomorrow with on the beach. The weather is suppose to be in the 80's so the coastal breeze will be good. Then I can't wait to see Iron Man Sunday at the Commodore. It's our old style movie theater in the area. It's actually a historic landmark and I have to admit it is stepping back in time when you go there.

I Tore it a New One!

Since I had a hole this afternoon at the office and it's like in the 70's I figured let me run some errands. You know Barnes & Noble, Starbucks, Hardees for some sweet tea, and the card shop for Eric. So on the way back to the office I figured let me get gas since this one gas station is the cheapest in the area. However in pulling in I hit the curb. In 10 seconds my tire was flat. I sliced that side wall real nice. It did give everyone something to look at. I felt like a just hit and animal and left it to die the way everyone was staring.

So after filling up I moved to the side to change it. I tell you I have never in my life changed as many tires as I have on this car in the 2 years I've had it. So I was happy to have done the deed in under 10 minutes. Also my extreme happiness at having a full size spare. Still having a few moments to spare I shot over to the tire place.

Now was my chance to get mines in the ass raping they gave me when I got these mofos. They were expensive as hell, but they have a life time guarantee on them for just such an occasion. The guy didn't look too happy to be giving me a brand new tire after 5 months for just about free.

Oh well. Who's your daddy now?

Williamsburg Here I Come

Well actually not till the end of the mont, but I signed up for a educational seminar to keep my lisence. Hope it will be enjoyable, but I know it will be a selling of products. Since German girl will be out of the country I was going to drive back and forth the hour each way. However I have to be there Sunday at 8 am so I decided to get a hotel and stay the night. There are enough festivals happening that weekend so I will probably find something to do. Although I would like to visit Williamsburg since in the 4 years I've lived here I haven't gone yet.

People may joke with me about dating, but I don't seem to have a problem meeting anyone like others. However meeting anyone of quality is more of the problem. So I think one of my usual breaks from dating will do me good. Even though I seem to be meeting more women than I usually do, I'm getting too much of the freak factor in it.

The Landlord is gone for the next 5 days so I have the place to myself. Music will be blasted for sure. My roommate, who I shall name Single, we have surmised is just plain lazy. I figured this out, but my landlord is finally getting on board. Hopefully she won't leave the place a mess till he gets home.
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