Going Sane in a Crazy World

My journey through life and the lessons I learn to help me grow spiritually.

Sane Friends

A Christmas Story

Boy this is like exercising.  You stop for a little while and forget about picking it back up again.  I just downloaded the ability to blog from my phone so I can do it when I'm sitting someplace.

Christmas was a bit of a workout.  Mostly since I have a hard time looking forward to things that are very important to me.  The Comic being one of them.  So while she was jumping all over the place in excitement I was pretty stoic about the whole thing.  Although I started to get a mild case of excitement as the festive day approached.  

It was nice to spend a holiday with someone I loved and cared about again.  Besides spending last year with Asp for the evening before she flew to see her parents it's been a while.  While Asp and I were never emotionally connected it was someone.  However comparing this year and last is like comparing apples and lizards.  So it was a Christmas to spend with someone which hasn't happened since 2003.  Yes it's been a long time and no Starbucks on the holiday.

Both the Comic and I enjoyed the presents we gave each other.  She was very thankful for all the help with Christmas especially being the first without her father.  It was my first one without my Mom, but that barely registered for me.  I talked to my brother and SIL on Christmas and the Comic could see what I always talk about with their machine gun questions that leave me with nothing to ask.  

Eric and I have been talking better on the phone which I've enjoyed.  He is changing and I'll have to change with him.

We had the third heaviest snow here in recorded history.  It made for a white Christmas which is was nice.  I wasn't happy about having to close the office for a day.  You can easily tell who's from here and who is not.  I was like let's go out while the Comic was like we're stuck inside.  It's become a joke of me saying, "I'm from NY."

I have to admit the holiday really brought us closer together. 

When Life Resembles Art

Over the last few weeks I've been using my free time in the car to listen to education sales CD's to help sharpen my game.  I use to save this for my trips to see Eric, but since that didn't happen this time and I'm in the car at least 20 minutes a day I can get through a series in a few weeks.  I learn a lot and it keeps me in a good frame of mind.  

An interesting story on my present series talked about how when you move from one level in your life and move to a higher one ie. better job, more money, etc.  It will make you uncomfortable until you get use to it.  Depending on how big the change will dictate how much discomfort you will experience.  The author's story was about a twenty something farmer who became a sales person. He was making 2 sales a week and making $2000 commission for the sales.  After making the second sale he would go home, draw all the curtains and crawl into a fetal position in his bed.  Getting that much money was too much for him.

In the last 2 months I've gotten the office busier and I've made more money.  Great.  However like I learned from this CD if you are not use to the extra money you will get rid of it in some shape or form.  I spent it on upgrades for the office, some DVD's for me, and dinners out with the Comic.  Now I look at all the money I earned and wonder where it went.  Lesson learned on that area.

The second area is I can get pessimistic when the office doesn't respond the way I want it to.  The Comic is good in helping me see all the positive stuff so I can build myself back up.  I have to admit she did a really good job last night.  Since then I've been torturing myself with every single bill and debt I owe.  Nothing has changed in the last 24 hours.  I'm just having a hard time getting comfortable in a better place.  

I remember when I didn't have all that chaos in my life after divorce.  It felt so strange and I was almost looking for stuff to be back in that pressure just because I was use to it.  The mind is a strange thing, but I do tell my patients that anything done for 2 weeks the body starts to believe is normal.  

"The only person who likes change is the one with the wet diaper."

Writing With Traction

I see I'm getting to blogging one a week now.  How times have changed.  Happy to say I'm busier now and that I don't have time to blog.  While there are many times during the week that something comes up that I would normally blog about has gotten pushed aside to do work.  It's something I'm grateful for since I'm meeting my weekly goals that I've set for myself.  Still stuck in a 30 day cycle, but I'm stretching myself as best as I can to get to a 6 month and then 1 year list of goals.  My true goal is a 5 year plan, but since I've been formally writing my goals down again only 2-3 weeks now I'm not expecting miracles.

The Comic and I are still doing wonderfully.  Our ability to talk through any situation that has come up between us has been our best quality.  I did talk to her this week about cutting back our dining out since it's busting my budget.  It was a big thing for me since bringing something up like this in my past always meant problems.  However it went over well and we set about shopping together so we can cook together when we see each other.  I knew ahead of time that it would be no problem, yet it caused all kinds of anxiety.  It will take many times of this happening in a positive manner for me to have the faith that it will all work out.

My birthday last week turned out great and I really enjoyed my presents from the Comic who has helped me pick up my long lost hobby of modeling and painting.  Once the New Year passes I'll pick up some paints to start painting the figures that she bought me.

The holidays are in full swing for us.  We will be stopping at her mom's tomorrow to decorate the house.  She helped me decorate my room last weekend and it looks great.  All my presents are bought and wrapped.  I'll mail out Eric's stuff Monday so I can avoid most of the holiday rush.  

The funny thing on gift giving is that the Comic wanted this nice ring she had seen.  I told her I would get it for her for Valentine's day.  It arrived yesterday.  I've bought a lot o jewelry over the years especially having worked in the jewelry industry.  This is the second ring I've ever bought.  The first was my ex's engagement ring.  So holding this one brought up some feelings.  Nothing bad though.

At present I'm happy to see my life improving faster than it has in a while.  Having the Comic in my life has helped me want to achieve more which is something big for me.  I've never been able to find many things to inspire me to shoot for higher goals on a consistent basis.  It's been nice and a bit scary to be focused and wanting better for myself.  It's been about 3 months and counting now.  I've got traction under my feet and with that I can achieve a lot.   
Related Posts with Thumbnails