The Spitting that Happened

I'm happy to say that Hurricane Earl just spitted on us. Being a seaside community, you can feel the frantic energy when a storm comes up the coast to possible wash us into the ocean or bay. I have to admit people fall into one of two categories. The first is your buying enough water to make a trek across the Sahara on foot. The other is you don't give a shit. I fall into the category 2. I would like to say that I'm realistic which I am, but in this instance I think its just a charmed life feeling.

After a few weeks on hiatus I ventured out to do my beach walk with L. With the coming storm it was interesting to see people working like ants down there to secure everything. After last November's northeaster which did millions of dollars of damage here, waterfront people aren't taking a chance. However there were plenty of asshats there. People playing with their little kids in the surf. One guy was setting up for para-sailing. They'll probably find him in NY later today.

The only good thing about the storm was that no one wanted to come in this morning so I'm home relaxing. I'll go in for the afternoon for a meeting and some patients. I did get to talk to GI Joe some more. He is a nice guy, but we're just two different people and connecting will be rough.

I have to admit the Comic is funny and makes me smile most of the day. I'm packing up to stay at her place tonight. One of the funnier things with her is the huge list of things that turn her on. Actually I would be hard pressed to make a list of turn offs. While most could understand the handcuffs. My scrub top is also a favorite as is my Marvin Gaye CD. I think I'll just close my eyes and randomly grab stuff and see what happens.

Goodbye, I'll Miss You

I'm hanging out alone tonight. It's really the last night that I'll have nothing happening at the house. Tomorrow we'll pack the cars up with my clothes so everything will be ready for the movers Saturday morning. So I think I'll say goodbye to the house. I've been here 5 years which is a long time and I think it deserves a nice send off. I totally have no clue what I'm going to do, but I think I need something. Also while I'm at it I think I'll say goodbye to my Mom too. With that I think I'll just talk to her ashes.

A lot is changing in my life right now and I want to make sure I don't skip any steps. Especially with the Comic in my life. She grounds me in what's going on. I know I can easily slip into a more stoic mood when I'm by myself. When I'm with her I seem to stay better attached to my emotional side.

Last night's comedy show was great. J Medicine Hat changed it up which was great. I've seen many of his shows and know all the jokes and acts. With different people participating it's always different, but it can get a bit stale. So it was a big surprise to hear new jokes and see some different scenes. The Comic really enjoyed it which made me happy.

Even though its an oven outside today I'm getting back to my walks with L. I doubt if I'll do a full one after a few weeks off. My body is pretty much back to normal. I don't seem to need a nap during the middle of the day anymore.

It's the Hot Tub

Well after many inquiries I did go see a place last night. It wasn't to far from where I live now. About the same distance to work and very close to the Comic. Like a first date I felt everything out and felt comfortable and safe with the place. The owner had did the same thing I had done. Used our email address to see if we were on Facebook. With that she found my business website which went a long way. The house was very nice, right off a golf course. It had a screened in large porch with bar and a hot tub in the back for my use also. I told her I would let her know today. However I went to the Comics last night and on talking about it and sharing how I felt. I called right back and took the place. Good places are hard to find and go even faster. It's $80 more than I'm paying now which is what I expected to pay. So I'll move in there on the 17th of next month since I can't start working on the move until Eric goes back. I wanted more than 4 days to get everything ready for a move. The Comic offered to help which will be great. I can lift everything except my mattress which is just too long for me. The biggest gift she has is her organization and decorating skills. So she'll be a big help in setting my new room up.

L's friend called yesterday before I knew I would be seeing anyplace. I agreed to see her place today since she sounded more sane. However it was more of an appeasement since I like having a drama-free life. Stepping into her alcohol affected life is not something I want to pay for.

So one duck down and now onto the next. Work and getting more business is the next one although I feel a little burned out on it. I may just need a day or two off with it. Over the weekend I'll get ready for Eric's visit. So I think the neighborhood BBQ is next up on my list.

Tonight the Comic and I are having dinner and a movie at her place. I go over and cook dinner and bringing Defending Your Life for her to see.

Upheaval

While it was a great weekend with the Comic. On my personal front its been a rough few days. Tone is having someone do a estate sale on the household stuff. So Jim is going through the house price tagging everything. What I found out this morning in my quick run through is that all the dishes and pots are now for sale and I can't use them. I'm going to have to dig mine out of storage and keep them in my closet so no one buys them. Not quite sure what I'm doing about pots and pans. Mine are so buried its not funny. My bathroom doesn't seem to be getting put back together so I'm going to have to use one of the others in the house.

The next big bump in the road is that L's friend is not sure if she is going to rent to me or not. The sticking point is her alcoholic boyfriend that she is trying to sort out. If it falls apart I have a place. If it doesn't I don't. I'm going to see the place Friday to see if it's even a possibility for me. However I will probably be putting this on the back burner since I don't rely on active addicts for stuff.

Today started at the office with 4 reschedules. I'm happy they called which is a step up from Friday, but I need the business. Things are starting to slide back down which I don't like.

The last thing is that I get a letter from a business wanting to know of what I thought of our business park since they are thinking of buying it. WTF? Can I have any stability someplace in my life. I tossed out the questionnaire because I have nothing to gain by taking my time out to spend filling out 3 pages of questions.

Not Interested

Well 1 down and 2 to go. I didn't have high hopes and it didn't disappoint. L is like me in that we are on time people. 45 minutes late they show up. Mostly because her 2 friends are stopping to talk to everyone. I pretty much knew instantly it wasn't a match for me. She was a nice person, but not much happiness inside her and it showed. The good thing about the night was that L's other friend is the one who has the place for rent. I was starting to think it was going to go south, but before I left she was like we need to talk about this. So I'll call her during the week since she admitted she sucks at that part. I did meet one of L's guy neighbors who was very entertaining.

Trying to get out of the office tonight to go dancing my new business landlord stopped by. He want to know what I wanted to do since my lease was up in January. I asked my options since I really hadn't though of any. I just wasn't looking to move. So we decided on a 3 year lease in which my rent wouldn't increase. If I re-upped it would increase then. I was good with that. Also I was happy to hear that he had hired someone to fill up all the vacancies we have in the park. That was more my worry since we are starting to have a lot of empty offices.

Dancing went well tonight. My friend couldn't make it till the end which actually worked out better. The female instructor who had helped at my patient appreciation was able to convey the things I needed to learn in a way that I understood. Mostly that I was over thinking it which is my norm. My friend was trying to push me towards the salsa like I use to do, but it's not me. I enjoy the rumba better and will shoot for taking lessons next month after Eric goes back home. They asked what I wanted to do with what I learned. I told them I had no idea, but I wanted to have the options of knowing what I was doing.

Date 2 is tomorrow at 1. A normal Starbucks date. She seems to be an experienced dater like myself so it should go smoothly either way. Out of the 3 I would put money on this one.

The Magic Act

I think I may have broken the monogamous serial dater status that I've been given in the past. I have 3 dates with 3 separate women. It's always a bit weird when you plant a bunch of seeds and they all bloom together.

Tonight's one with L's friend I don't have much hopes for. L thinks since I don't drink and her last boyfriend was an alcoholic it will make a good connection. I think her self-esteem has been blown out of the water. I'm not quite sure how long they've been broken up, but I don't think it's been more than 6 months. She's an attractive woman and I'm usually happy to meet new people. I am surprised that after about 80 women I finally go out with someone with the same name as my ex.

Tomorrow's Starbucks date has the highest hopes. She seems stable, but who the hell knows. She's direct with her emails which I'm not use to with women, no offense. I find myself being the chatty one.

Lastly is my left over one from last week. We we thinking about last night and it didn't work out. At present she's at the bottom of the list just because I feel she has a bit too much craziness in her life. She's still riding the waves of her divorce process.

On the topic of my business coach. Changing gears here. It reminds me of when I stopped therapy years ago. While there was a bumpy section right afterwards I had to really work it and develop a different support system to get through things. I have things now in place for help in business. Although I still need strategic alliance partners in my field. It's a weird field since most people don't see it as a business.

Bad planning on my part. I'm beat today like I usually am after a beach walk. Flat feet are wonderful. So it's going to be a long day with dancing tonight and then meeting up with L's friend.

Drinks

Bit sad this morning. I don't like the end of relationships as you might know. Last month my business coach missed our appointment. First time ever. A week later I got a text saying that he had been sick and he would call me. I didn't show for our next meeting since I never heard from him. However he showed for that one. So the score is even. I texted him that we would just do our next meeting which would be today. However he's a no show today. I know as accounts go I'm his smallest, although I have been the one to stick it out the longest with him since he returned to the area. With a no show this morning I take it that its over. It's a pity party in my mind to and I'll call and leave a message later since it's always hard to get to him.

What this does is I have to pull out everything I've learned in the last 1 1/2 years and keep up with everything. Accountability is going to be the rough part. While talking to Shah weekly is a help she's not one to be confrontational.

L has invited me to to meet one of her friends tomorrow night. I met her a while back when she was dating someone who was an alcoholic. I'm not quite sure if she has learned anything from that, but I'll see pretty quickly enough when all of us get together tomorrow night after my dance lesson. The weirdest thing is that she has the same name as my ex. Not saying its a deal breaker, but it will be a bit weird for me. I almost dates another woman with the same name, but it never happened.

I talked with the woman I was supposed to meet last Saturday. Again she seems to be fun to joke around with, but I get the sense that it's just not a match. Whether we'll meet or not is up in the air.

End of an Era

I was hit with horrible news this morning. My favorite Starbucks will close after this month. I was really shocked when Mike gave me the news this morning as I got the second of my free drinks this week. It was the first in the town center area and now there are 2 others in a 5 block area. The great thing about it is it's big. Plenty of room for people to sit and relax. Most of the others in the area don't have the sitting room and fill up fast. I've spent countless hours relaxing in this one. Many coffee dates as well as business meetings. I'll miss the people there who know me and what I drink. The other, like getting a new person to take care of your hair, will be finding a new place to relax and make my own.

The law enforcement lady who I wasn't expecting much turned about to be a bit more and less than what I thought. She wanted my number the other night to put a voice with my face. She called me from work and honestly I think she only wanted to hear my voice and not talk cause she was ready to get off pretty quickly. I was ready to talk for a bit, but that didn't happen. I guess I didn't pass the voice test since it seems to have died on the telephone line.

Yesterday while L and I were walking we spotted a very attractive woman watering her garden. Ten feet later we found a lost dog. L went down the street to a person she thought was the owner and possible date for her. Garden lady said she would grab her cell phone. She wasn't that chatty with me even with a few comments. Oh well just keeping my hand in it all.

I'll be happy that Tone is going home today. I have to admit having someone around the house is bothersome. Also that she has every light on in the place when she is around. I don't get it.

I see it's going to be feast and famine weekends. This weekend I have nothing going on and I need to find something to keep me occupied so I don't squirrely. Next weekend is pretty nicely scheduled with game night and I'm volunteering to help a friend raise money for diabetes.

That Which Divides

I want to thank everyone for their kind words. Last night I did sleep better than the previous 3 nights which I was fuming a bit. I got some view points from L and Shah on my "happy 2 month" statement with Kitcat since they are polar opposites. Both agreed it could be a problematic statement since it would show where both of are at. Having dated L I knew she would have bolted to since she is a player and any form or relationship is terms for dumping. Shah likes to celebrate all the "moments" in a relationship. We both agreed it didn't have to be presents, but acknowledging it was big. So I was a little sad for having said it, but no regretting it. I know what really broke us up was lack of communication on Kitcat's part. I've seen it in the two months I've known her. Stuff connected to her survival she took care of with a ferocity. Other things that were important, but rough to deal with she pushed off. So I got to see where I stand. I've always known that it's not the fun time that defiance a relationship. It's the shortcomings that do. Communication and intimacy are huge with me and not having any willingness to work and use them doesn't do it for me. So with that it was easier to just let it go.

I will say that Kitcat did text me yesterday to let me know how she did on her test. I waited about an hour to congratulate her on it and that was it. When the text arrived I freaked out. I still drop back to the mindset that I don't know what to do. It's a strange place to be. I've survived so much through my life and I have to admit I didn't know what I was doing, but I got through it. Yet that fear still survives. Once I sat still for a moment I was able to get back to my senses and regain my serenity. However that was it of the communication. I have a funny feeling she'll text again when she is free and is looking for something to do.

Shah told me something many of my female friends have said before, "no more crazy women." I have to admit I still can pick them. My picker is still screwed up in finding someone wanting the same things.

I do have to admit I'm feeling awkward about starting my profile back up where I met Kitcat. It's the same old song and dance. It's not my fault, but I'm picking up the guilt and shame. Oye. I'll just have to do it and go with it.

On a good note. Holy crap is this a busy week at the office. It will be a record week with plenty to spare. Also tomorrow will be a record day if everyone shows. Now I'm just trying to catch up emotionally. I feel so busy in the back of my mind, but looking at the schedule I still have blocks of free time. So I'm just adjusting to this new level of activity because if I don't I'll sabotage myself into getting slow again and I've worked to hard to do that. However it's happened in the past and its a road that I want to avoid.

The New Porn

My beach hike with L today was on the brutal side. The tide was high so we were walking in the soft shifting sand. I have severe flat feet. As one of my patients said they're like duck feet. Distance walking always does a number on me and with the uneven surface today, I'm feeling it tonight. I tell you I don't know how I did valet for so long. The only thing I could say is that it was always a short run of about 2 blocks with a rest in between. I do remember the nights that I ran all night long that I could barely walk the next day. Tomorrow I know I'm going to be moaning and groaning as I move around.

Kitcat called me late last night. I originally thought she needed my help since she said she was stuck, but it turned out it was tunnel traffic. Being underground was messing with the reception. Her younger son was staying over her older son's place for the night. I had hoped that I would be able to see her, but it didn't happen. Kitcat apologized and knew we would get to bed quickly, but sleep would be a long while off. She was getting together with her boys early this morning to go to Busch Gardens. So I'm hoping to see her Tuesday night. Since she doesn't have her son next week I'm going to suggest going up to Colonial Williamsburg next Sunday. I know she's been wanting to go see it for a while. She use to work their years ago and wants to see the place again.

I'm still waiting to hear back from L's friend about the opening in her place. Hopefully I'll hear more mid-week.

Okay I haven't watched porn in a long time. I see their has been some changes in how they do things which is neither here nor there. The big thing which I've heard other people talk about is this spitting thing. WTF? Seriously WTF? Their is a whole industry of lubricants out there. So I can't see the reason for this when a woman is performing oral sex on a guy or when a guy is doing it to help in penetration. Is this some new fangle thing that gets all the young people hot and horny? Hey maybe I'm just getting old. Soon I'll be wondering where my social security check is and wondering why all the music is so loud.

Dating in Pictures

Tone is here for a few days trying to hire someone to take care of the lawn and stuff. She let me know she was trying to have the place ready to rent for August, but she knew it would probably be later than that. The good thing is that L's friend has a condo which has extra space for rent that would be ready in September which would work out well. She no longer wants to rent to women since she's gone a lot as a flight attendant and her clothes seem to disappear. I gave up cross dressing in another life so I have no problems. The nice thing is that it would be close to the water. I'm glad that I'll be able to switch over unless something changes. I just hate change to begin with.

Tone gave me the web address for the landlord's pictures of his burial at Arlington National Cemetery. It looked like a nice ceremony, but I have to admit it made me sad looking at them.

Kitcat made me very happy last night by calling to chat before she went to bed. Little things like that make my day. We chatted a little while. I'll see her tonight, but I have a feeling I won't be staying at her place. We're meeting down at Town Center after her meeting ends and she has 3 tests tomorrow. Jeez that's just abusive since she only has 1 teacher. I do want to talk to her setting up some system to better plan us getting together. The other point I almost feel weird doing since I take it for granted. It's the exclusivity talk. It's the way I am, but there is something for making a point with it. The last time I did this talk was with Law girl which I have to admit was one of my healthier relationships even though it didn't go very far. However I do remember her saying that I did everything right.

Yesterday may have been the bomb at work, but today it's a fart. I only had one patient on the books and he rescheduled. So I was happy to have someone else come in to take his place. Tomorrow again is a nice packed day. With everyone coming in all in a small block which will be nice. I will tell you it was strange to have free time today. I have to admit I really haven't goofed around either. Phone calls, marketing, and basis admin stuff has been the flavor of the day. I'm just about finished with everything I need to get done today and I'll take a break and watch some MI 5 which I got out the library. I was very happy to get it quickly since they just got it in. I guess me checking regularly for stuff is paying off.

The Long Hot Sun

In about 30 minutes I'm going to be on the beach walking with L. Not quite sure if I'm looking towards it since its 92 and humid out there. Yeah I know cry a river. Super hot heat and I don't get along well. I'm going to be a dripping mess when this is finished.

I was hoping to see Kitcat last night, but that never materialized as she tries to do the juggling act with all that is going on. I'm happy we've been talking. However I'm not quite sure if I should talk to her about this saying she'll do something and it never appears. Most of it is I'll call you when I finish xyz and it never happens. It came to my mind when she said she would stop by my office on the way to school to hang for a while. It never happened because she had to study which was okay. I think she has the intention to do these things and she just forgets when she gets really busy. Hard to tell what this is all about and if I should be worried or not. I guess time will tell.

It was one of those flux days of people stopping in, not showing, and rescheduling all day today. Not much I had in the books today happened like it should of. The one thing that did work was talking to Shah about business. We are making it a weekly thing and it was very helpful today. The funny thing is she reminded me of what I use to say to patients 9-10 years ago and it flowed out of my mouth like it was yesterday. I'll have to start using it nowadays cause it was very good.

I think I'm going with the everyday earrings for Kitcat. I'll try to remember to take a picture of them. Okay I'm off to enjoy my life of Riley.

Anxious Moments

I'm getting tired of my anxiety filled days. Having been off medication since September it's become a daily thing. While I was medicated this wasn't a problem and I didn't even know it. Now that I'm on my own its a workout. I'm not anxiety ridden all day, but I have to work at it to keep my serenity. I have to admit I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop even when things are going good. I'm the best person at taking away my own happiness. However since I know I can talk myself in off the ledge I can rid myself of this problem. The problem is just getting to point that I'm sick and tired of it and want to do something about it. Just being a problem isn't enough. Weird I know. However today the gauntlet has been thrown. What changed? Well before leaving the office last night, I had a bunch of things happen like dominoes, but they were all good things. However by the end I was anxious as hell most likely because I feel the loss of control like on a roller coaster. I was angry cause good stuff was happening and I was being negative about it. I know this will prevent it from happening again if I keep putting a negative connotation to these events and I work to hard to keep stopping myself.

The Photographer invited me to the Funny Bone last night. I hadn't planned on going since Kitcat couldn't make it, but since she had done all the work why not. It was a very interesting show. The MC had cerebral palsy and not lightly. However he was hilarious and had a quick wit. The second guy was okay and the headliner was good. They taped the show for the headliner and MC for their show coming on TV.

I finally broke down and made a Facebook page for my business. If you want daily health care tips on sleeping, stress, etc. Take a look.

Well this week is turning out to almost be descent. Now I'm getting ready for my weekly beach walk with L then Kitcat invited me over for sloppy joes with her son. I feel bad for her. That time in your life when you separate and divorce can be like you keep getting hit and never see a break. I remember it well and not to fondly.

The Show That Went On

I went over Kitcat's last night after my beach walk with L. She was sad since she had closed up her business yesterday as she segways into a new profession. From what I've seen she was good at the diet industry and I know she wished her divorce hadn't affected her business. I know from first hand experience it does a number on it. I want to pick her brain on marketing since I can see she is very good at it. When she wanted to go to Europe she made it happen with a lot of deals. Now she is doing the same to go a few places in the states.

Last night was a first for us. Sex in an actual bed. Usually we've been tearing into each other in the living room with clothes flying. Her cats haven't been scarred yet. I'm not quite sure if the occupants of the hotel across the street watched, although I hear they can put on a good show. The best thing was being able to relax next to each other afterwards and talk. Its usually at that moment when we're all the most vulnerable. I could see I was feeling this missing from our relationship. Kitcat and I seem to be going down a different path than I usually go. Nothing wrong with it, but things that I come to look forward to were missing and that was one of them. The other was falling asleep next to each other.

Kitcat's window opens up onto the strip at the oceanfront. While pretty to look at its noisy as hell. We fell asleep with them open and I was awoken frequently from drunks yelling, cars revving, etc. However like I told her this morning it was worth it. At least the noise probably blocked us out too. One thing that I do know with Kitcat is that she does like me.

L found me a place to live that will open in a few months. It's a lot closer than OVDC's place. So I'll ask Tone what her schedule is when I see her in 2. This place would be about $200 more a month than I'm paying now, but it would be a nice place. So I'll see.

The Spirit of the Meeting

This morning was my monthly neighborhood business meeting. Yes the one that I am now in charge of. It's the only meeting that I have which makes me nervous. All my other meetings I'm in charge of also or at the least leadership, so what makes this different? I feel like I'm hanging out in the breeze. Then this morning I realized that in all my other meetings there are other positions and people helping. So that's how I went with it this morning. People got assignments last month so I just followed up on that and asked a lot of questions to the group. I do think I'm going to need to start making positions to have some extra accountability for people. However at the end, the true spiritual aspects of the group came out. People working together to help each out business wise just cause they work close together. It was nice to see.

I feel like I live logging camp. It's just so weird to come home and see trees down all over the property. With the change in time I get home and it's still light which is awesome. However the house is getting a lot of attention from the neighbors. People are stopping by to look or gawk as it may be at the place. No one's asked me anything which I don't care on.

I did get the ordinances for signs in the city today. After about 10 seconds of reading it, I thought my head was going to explode. Yes it had been legalized and no longer fit to be read by normal human beings. I'll try to make heads or tails of it all, but I think I'm screwed with 100 signs.

Tonight I'll grab my beach hike with L since the weather is so awesome today and then I'll meet the singles for game night. Kitcat gained major points by being a sci-fi geek since they are a rare breed female wise.

Office Gossip

Well I've gotten my exercise groove on all this week. I lost it somewhere while dating Asp and the landlord's decline. I was still going, but not as frequently as I'd like. The last bastion of what I was missing was cardio. I enjoy my beach walks with L, but I know I could use some more exercise for my heart. I had plenty of time to do so this morning and I had to admit it was a bit of a toss up. However I knew I would feel better afterwards. Although I didn't factor in doing my legs yesterday so the pain factor is affect now.

For most of my adult life I've either worked for myself or had complete autonomy to run a business. So I do forget how other people work like having an office to call your own. One of the most asked questions I get asked is if I've ever had sex in my office. Guys always ask while the women usually just perk their ears up. With my own business I have to admit having fun with Asp and the Planner here. Not at the same time though. Being the only employee has its perks.

However when I use to administrate clinics I use to have staff. Now as anyone who has worked in a office environment knows gossip is the biggest energy booster next to the last chocolate birthday cake they was had for a fellow employee. Anyway at the time I was seeing this woman who was totally infatuated with me. I had seen her around the office a few times and we had talked. I thought she was very attractive, but the conversations never really went anyplace so I didn't think much of it. Until one day she came into the place an asked to see me. I led her into my office and asked her what she wanted. I still remember her looking out my window and asking me if I like her or not. I said yes. At times I still can't believe this happened. She said that was good. She walked over to me, dropped to her knees, and ripped my pants open. That's how our relationship started.

How this relates to office gossip. Well everyone wanted to know if we were having sex or not since she would come to see me 2-3 times a week at work. So every time we were going at it in my office someone would be calling to ask questions, knocking on my door, etc. I tell you I don't enjoy having my sex interrupted.

My staff not to be deterred from my evasion techniques decided to up the ante one day. Again we were going at it on my desk when they knocked liked usual, but instead of needing my attention they needed hers. For some unknown reason she decided to talk to them. So she got dressed and I just hid underneath my desk naked until they were finished. I still laugh at this all these years later. Anyway my staff had their answer since I had left a condom wrapper on the side of my desk. The good thing was they never bothered me again.

Quiet Tuesday

When I got home last night I was amazed to finding both driveways glowing. Well not actually glowing, but boy did they stand out in the dark. I knew we were getting the house pressure washed yesterday, but I didn't expect the driveways to be done too. I didn't even park on it last night since it was so nice to look at.

While yesterday was a great day in the office, today is less than spectacular. So I've been working on a few presentations that I want to do to talk to a some local businesses. I finally took down all the stuff from the health fair that never happened. Plus packed up everything I no longer needed here in the office so I can get the massage room going again.

The local recreation center I go to stopped by today to offer me the last chiropractors spot on their magazine rack. If they didn't want all the money up front I might consider. In my profession people don't usually look for me until they need help. I know a few of the people down there and have gotten a few patients that way. While people putting my face with what I do might be nice I'm not quite sure it balances out the price tag.

Since my evenings are busy this week L and I are beach walking tonight before I meet the singles for $1 movie Tuesday. We're seeing Up in the Air tonight.

I Made This

I get a proud feeling when I open my pantry closet. I know I'm strange, but it's mine and makes me happy. No this is not a picture of mine. Like I was telling L yesterday, this is the first time I really lived on my own. College was the only other time which truly isn't living on your own when its dorm life. I don't mind cleaning the place up when it's my mess. I use to get this feeling when the landlord use to go on his trips and I'd be here for a few weeks by myself. However since he's not coming back this time and he's presence in the house is long gone, I've come to feel like this is my domain. Once I get all my debt out of the way I would like to move into my own place whether it be an official apartment or something that is truly my own. Looking at it with hindsight I see this progression of growing with places.

Tonight's Funny Bone event was fun. Even better since I wasn't hosting. However everyone showed up late, even the guest host. Since we had to be there early to pick up the free tickets it worked out. We were right next to the stage and I and one other member got picked on. I made out better than she did. All he wanted to know is if I ever get stopped by airport security. He asked her if she liked jizz on her face. Yeah the last comedian was a bit over the top.

Out of the Loop

It's been in the book for months. I've been gathering everything up for it. I've called for advice on how to get the most out of it. I packed the car up with a ton of stuff today and went there. No one was there. I guess somewhere along the line I got out of the loop of today's health fair. I'm grateful I didn't cancel any appointments for it, but I was looking forward to the event. Usually I don't verify these things since they are a large to-do and involve so many facets that once scheduled it happens unless the world ends. I left a message and we'll see what happens.

Today's gripe is still from last night. This week was a high "no show" week. Some had good excuses like the patient that lost her job that day. Hey life happens. Another was someone I reminded 2 days prior and he still forgot. So I'm fully instituting as of March first a $25 charge for no shows. Since I don't double book to keep wait times down I really get screwed when someone doesn't show. I have to admit it's usually the same people over and over so if I lose them it's not really a loss.

It was nice to come home last night and cook dinner which I hadn't done in over a week with Tone and family in the house. I did some mild straightening up and I'll vacuum the place tonight. I'm always amazed at how much I desire stability in my home life. I guess never having it for most of my life has left me with that. I moved some of the stuff they left lying around to places that were out of my way. Most of the house I don't care too much about, but I do like the breakfast nook, kitchen, and my bathroom kept neat. The other 4 bed rooms I could care less about since I can always close the doors. However I would like it to be nice to look into. When I start having guests over I'll do something with the living room since its still partially personalized to the landlord.

Today marks the first Saturday in a month with no snow which I can't believe is a stat here. It actually is a very nice day and I'm doing my weekly beach walk with L today.

Getting Back to Normal

Well it's day 1 of getting back to my regular scheduled program. I never really gave my heart to Asp so it's not really painful. However just daily habits need to be exorcised like the texting and calls. I have to admit it was nice to sleep soundly last night which I hadn't been doing all week. So I dropped off the replacement bulb for her microwave in her mailbox today after my appointment with OVDC. If she text me to thank me I'll have an idea if she can do this friend thing or not.

It was good to get to the gym today and I need to get back in the swing of things with that. I've been spotty all year long which is no good for me. Plus this week with going to see Eric I won't be walking with L.

Every once in a while I clean house on FB to drop people I don't really communicate with. I don't need to have a million friends in my counter. I just need to have people I care about. So I got a rush of them over the last week from people I dropped off over the last few months. I was surprised Tango girl put a request in. While I think she's very attractive I don't think we have it to make a relationship. Although I haven't talked to her in a while and I knew she was new from marriage then.

I tell you since my car broke down 2 years ago when I went to visit Eric I still get a dread fear when I'm going to drive up there. It's been with me for a week or so now. That waiting for the other shoe to drop. I find myself getting in my car thinking it's not going to start up this time. I'm really trying to let it go cause it's not helping me any.