2008 Dating Round Up

The other day, okay it was yesterday, I commented on how I've noticed changes in myself business wise. Well today I'm reflecting on dating this year since it was a big year for me.

Law girl started it out for me. She was the first "normal" woman I ever dated. While our chemistry level wasn't super it was a real kick being with someone who was "normal". No dram, problems, etc. It was very weird and totally virgin territory for me. On the other hand she strung me along for a while since I was such a nice guy that she waned. However guilt finally got the best of her and we broke up since she knew it wasn't fair to me to tie me down to someone that was not going to deepen the relationship with. I should of learned then to require chemistry.

The Planner was next and my longest relationship besides my ex. She will always have a special place in my heart since there was so much I liked about her: the goal setting, her physical side, silliness, looks, etc. However there was always some strong issues on the opposite side. The biggest was always the sleeping arrangement. She never wanted to sleep in the same bed together which was always a deal breaker for me and she knew it. I don't do Lucy and Ricky. The other was her controlling attitude. However I got more of my sexual mojo back with her and saw again how long term relationships really are great with how they grow.

The Photographer was a surprise for me. I knew she was a chaos type girl, but I never thought I would feel as attracted to her as I did once we dated. What I had knocked back into me was that when you date chaos there's always problems. While I wouldn't date her I would probably have sex with her for some reason.

Tech girl taught me firmly that a spark is needed to make things work. Also she was the first women for me to break up with since my marriage.

There were a lot of screwed up women mixed in there that never really got off the ground. Like Army girl who was so drunk the night I met she didn't remember me or our conversation. I didn't even think she was that drunk. There was Red who said she was separated, but then introduced me to her husband. The Florist with her bizarre home life and arrangements. Lastly the VP who was emailing me pornographic pictures of her after 3 minutes on the phone.

It was a very good year.

Dating Playbill

I was talking to a friend yesterday and they asked how dating was going. ROFLMAO! So I had to write out the list to make sure I didn't forget anyone. So I figured I'd post it here with 2 new ones. Hey you need to keep up.

Charming - we emailed, talked, know each other from the singles group. We plan to go out. 3 hours before hand she text me that her son is sick and cancels. She tells me she will call me later. Nothing.

Tax Girl - CPA very hyped to go out, but no way she can find the time before the 15th. Understood since I have friends that are CPA's and I know there going crazy. After the 15th - nothing.

Army Girl - explosives expert in the army. Yes I know I can pick them. We've been using ever form of communication for about a week and half now. However like Army girl will say a lot. Army life kills her relationships. We still haven't been able together since her schedule has been so erratic.

Stylist - I met at one of my single's events. I was more focused on Charming to really feel her out. She emailed me and we chatted a little. However I got to talk to her last night somewhat. Attractive, but I don't think it's a match.

VP - VP of the biggest east coast shipping co. We talked a little while and I mean a few minutes before she asked for my email address and sent me explicit pictures of herself. I joked about having to tie her up to be good. She made a comment about not being that type of girl and that was that. LMAO it was like a comedy show.

Sweet - just started talking to and we'll see how it goes. She had to run and we never finished talking. Maybe today.

Red - We chatted some last night. She hoped we could get together tonight, but I have Happy Hour. She has a wedding tomorrow so we're getting together Sunday. OMG an actual date.

So that was my last 2 weeks.

Hard, but Not Rock Hard

Talking to friends about dating and the mysterious no call back. It's hard not to become jaded. On the hand I try not to laugh at women who after one bad event are writing dating completely off. I'm a guy and rejection is a daily thing. You do things to lessen it happening, but it does. Not everyone is a match even though you desire it. I just wish people would be more honest with it. The best example was years ago after I got divorced I was watching TV and I still had cable an a reality show was on. In those days I'd watch anything to pass the time. Anyway it was a dating reality show and I remember this woman saying she wasn't into this guy who she dated and kept calling. She just didn't want to call him back and hoped he would get the message. Lady you just told all of America about it. I think it would have been easier to tell him.

Anyway what the hell was my point? Oh yeah Army girl. We're still trying to get together. However every time she says it will be this week, I'm starting to hear in the back of my mind, "yeah right." I don't want to go there. I know her schedule has been topsy turvy for over a week now. Army life so I know it's logistics problem at the moment. I guess so many blow offs and no return calls in the last week have harden me somewhat.

Well I have to big Singles events this week. Game night which is really growing fast is tonight. Charming signed up for it. Now it will be interesting if she shows up and if she'll say anything about blowing me off last week. Friday is the start of our Happy Hours series and it looks like our biggest turn out yet. I'm pretty proud. Now hopefully everyone shows up.

Offering Up a Prayer

I wasn't expecting to talk to Army girl last night. We had IM'ed earlier and she had to get up at 3 am. Yuck! Such is army life. Anyway what was really interesting is that for my other blog. I have a lot of different accounts so I can gather information. Anyway Army girl and I started talking in there also. It was pretty funny and we both wondered if it was a sign. So we ended up talking for over an hour last night. It's weird to be talking to someone about relationships and life when you haven't met. She's a very nice person and its' funny because she thinks all that she is done is normal, but it's above and beyond the normal. We ended up talking about her being 30 next week and me 41. Army girl likes older men just because we aren't looking to have kids and more settled in life. I like her because she hasn't become jaded in life yet. So I'm hoping their is chemistry when we meet up later in the week.

On the other hand I can see how people become so jaded on the online sites. 3-4 women who said they have wanted to get together have not panned out. I catch myself now when someone says it that I'll believe it when it happens.

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

It was nice to hear Army girl say tonight that she really wanted to meet me. I really didn't think it was going to happen. When I texted her tonight to see if she was free to talk she responded with a "why?" I told her to hear her voice and to see how her day went. When we talked she said some weird guy had asked her out and she doesn't know when someone is flirting with her. So we talked about that for a while. Also she asked about do older people (I guess me) like to date younger women (here) because older people are bitter. I told her their younger people were less jaded, but most younger people wanted kids still. I told her if you found a young person didn't want kids that wasn't jaded you had a prize. She reminded me she didn't want kids. So Army girl said she'll give me a call tomorrow to set a date. This is my busy week with all my Singles events going on.

Are We Dating?

Army girl and I are communicating quite frequently. She texted me yesterday after she got stopped by a State Trooper and all the things that happened which was like a scene from the Twilight Zone. Later she called and we talked for another 45 minutes like the night before. At least once during the conversation she has to ask me to stop laughing so much. I can't help it. She's a hoot. Every once in a while she'll blurt something sexual out. Most of the time I don't rise to the bait. If we've been out a few time maybe, but we haven't even met face to face yet. I always feel like it is a test to see what we are after. She asked if we would talk today and I said yes.

I texted her earlier wishing her a fun day since it is raining and I know she still has her niece and nephew there. We'll talk again later. I'm always worried about this. What me worry? In the past when I've talked to women in close proximity for a while we never get together. While I know this allows us to get to know one another. There still could be no chemistry. So we'll see.

The Phone Call

I knew Army girl had her niece and nephew this weekend. So I texted her to find out when she would be free. We did this back and forth as she had problems getting them bathed. It was nice to finally talk to her. Army girl think she's crazy, I think she is refreshing. She has a blurting problem and says what she thinks without any speed bumps. I'm usually laughing most of the time we communicate. She has to keep telling me to stop laughing. I have to admit she has a very colorful background. It's not abusive like mine, but growing up on a hippie compound must have been an experience. So we'll talk more when she gets back. She's on night duty till Thursday so I'm hoping next weekend we can get together. I tell you it will be interesting to date a woman with bigger feet than me.

The Little Engine that Could

Well at the end of this week Army girl is the only one still around. No responses from the other two. I tried dating this woman Dawn a few years back. We talked and IM'ed a lot, but could never get together. Something always came up or she forgot or something. One of my female friends said that a some women just want the attention. Who knows?

Anyway Army girl is now on night duty. How that happened I'll find out later since she gave me her number to call her. She's a good family person and seems surprised when I give her praise for it. She doesn't realize how many families do nothing for each other. I think a few of you hinted that the one I might discount may turn out to be the diamond in the rough.

Other than that I have my first interview Monday for a massage therapist for the office. I need this to get up and going to help give some influx of money into the office with the economy the way it is.

Feel Like I'm Playing the Stock Market

Well Charming never called last night. I would say she was busy with her son, but she was on Match. Who the hell knows? I run all the singles events, so we're going to run into each to other. So either say no or go out and say theirs no chemistry. Weird.

Also no reply from Tax girl either. I so love dating. Anyway in usual Mike fashion I started talking to someone else. She's going away for the weekend so we'll talk again next week. I knew Army girl was working last night so I didn't expect to talk to her. Hopefully tonight.

Motivation

I want to thank everyone for their views on my little experiment. It gave me a lot to think on and about why I do the things I do. Over the past 8 years I've come to realize that it doesn't matter what I do, but the motivation behind it that defines me.

I get a lot of compliments on my kissing ability. It's always been a surprise to me. My answer that I give when I'm asked is that the thoughts and intentions of my heart are behind it. I'm always working towards the best situation and I take the relationship as far it will go.

So back to my little experiment. I'm never into it just for a fun time or booty call. Something special is what I'm always looking for. It's what guides all my actions while I'm in a relationship and all the women I've been out with have enjoyed that.

Over the years I've heard and read enough about keeping women on a string like pearls. When one doesn't work the next is right behind her so that it keeps the anxiety level down. Going out with Spa girl I lost most of my insane anxiety. Anything that is left is normal. If I felt nothing then I know that I don't really care which is never a good place to start a relationship.

So I have my date with Charming tonight and I'll see how it goes. I left it off with Tax girl to contact me when she was free. So I don't have to do anything until I've gone out with Charming. I will not write Tax girl off to soon. I've done that in the past and that didn't work out well for me. So I'll keep making adjustments as more information comes in. All the way down on the scale is Army girl. She was the one from left field that would just be fun. Not holding my breath, but she is my last choice since I know it would be a limited relationship.

One Down, Two to Go

Well Charming and I got to talk tonight. Like she mentioned she is shy when it is one on one instead of the outgoing person she is in a group. It was a nice conversation, occasionally interrupted by her kids. I made a few jokes, especially with her living in another country being out in Suffolk. However she explained to me where she is which isn't to far. Why they call it the northern part is beyond me, I would say the eastern section. Oh well. Anyway we're set for the Baker's Crust Wednesday night.

Being a doctor, I've realized that perception is everything. So when Charming said how about later in the evening, I had to ask when would that be. She was like 6:30 and I'm thinking 8. Her time is better for me since I can shoot right over after work.

Since I've already met Charming she is on the top of my list. I would say Tax girl is next. Army girl I know is just for fun. She was too shocked to learn that I was married for 10 years. Our lives are too different, but we joke around so much I think it would be a blast to have drinks together.

Blowing My Mind

I'm the serial monogamous dater. One person at time, that being once I'm in pursuit of a woman I stop trying with others to I know what's going on. So this is weird and new territory to me. Tax girl said contact her Wednesday, Charming said call her later, and I just finished talking with Army girl who was busy tonight but swore that we would get together later in the week. When did this all happen? Yeah I know it's a real problem. Thanks for playing that tiny violin.

Tale of 3 Women

At times I may complain on problems meeting someone which usually gets me many jokes from my friends. They usually point out that I meet women and go out on a pretty regular basis for the amount of energy I put into it. So after this weekend I can't say anything for a while.

1) Tax girl - still waiting for the 16th to come around for her to have free time. I like her since she is like me, analytical with a artistic streak.

2) Army girl - you know I never met someone that didn't appear that drunk, but totally didn't know who I was the next day. She was very amusing Saturday night, but their was a whole new level of humor having the same conversation last night. Also throwing little tidbits like her breast size and her just shaking her head. She's a twenty something, but a lot of fun and speaks her mind which I like.

3) Charming - actually I have no idea what to nickname her so I'm going with her Match name. We met last month at my monthly comedy improv event. I was with Law girl so I didn't really notice her that much. Anyway we are both on Match and we chatted during the week. She's very outgoing which I really like. A little far for my taste, but at least on this side of the water. I figured I would see her last night at improv. She was lively and more attractive than I remembered. We'll go out sometime this week. Now I just need to learn the area she lives in.