Going Sane in a Crazy World

My journey through life and the lessons I learn to help me grow spiritually.

Sane Friends

A Train Wreck of a Visit

As many of you may or may not know I was suppose to be visiting my son Eric this weekend.  The problems started last weekend when he called to tell me that I needed to pick him up later than my usual time so he could do his homework.  I was okay with that since get it out of the way so we could concentrate on father-son time.  Then came the list of things needed for the weekend.  He would have lots of homework.  He would need a computer with Internet access.  Plus he would need a printer.  WTF?  I told him I would bring my laptop and we would be set on the whole computer and Internet thing.  I informed him that I wasn't dragging a printer up there for him.  I would bring a memory stick and he could just take it home and print the stuff up.  That was met with I don't think it would work.  So I told him we would take it someplace like Office Max or Kinkos and get it printed up.  This conversation also covered that he had pre-did a bunch of homework so he could go to a birthday party that weekend.  I smelt my ex at work here.  The usual sticking it to me and I need to take it to see our son.  

Then last night I got a call from Eric telling me that the visit is canceled.   WTF again.  He informs me that my ex had a procedure done this week and is still under the weather from it.  He's going to stay with her this weekend.  I told him that we will have to reschedule for a later date.  

We've had visits canceled before, but this one really hit me hard for some reason.  Mostly because it brings up a lot of stuff from the past.  I have a hard time getting excited to see Eric since it's a big thing and I'm use to growing up and having big things derailed at the end.  So when this happened the sadness of the present and the past really collided to make me a very depressed person right now. 

4 people had cathartic therapy:

From reading you in the past, I remember that you are very demonstratively loving with Eric AND you fill your time together with so many things he enjoys.
You do the best you can, and I'm sure he is thrilled with the time the 2 of you do have together.

Having this derailed hurts, but you will make up for it in the future. I know that doesn't help so much now though. I am sorry.


Ugh! How disappointing! How old is your son? apparently he is caught in the middle between you and your ex...not a good place to be. Sometimes kids are unwittingly playing loyalty games...it's not their fault - its part of the experience of having separated/divorced parents. How tough. Hang in there. Be patient with him. Love him even when these things happen (and of course you do), and your relationship will be stronger as a result...!


I get so frustrated everytime I read about her using Eric as a pawn. Know that my heart is with you, my friend. I know I've been off the grid for a bit, but you're in my thoughts.


Mary - Thanks. You're right it doesn't help, but it is much appreciated.

Blue - He's 11. Yes I know. It's how I grew up and its not a fun place to be.

TOM - thanks for all the warm wishes.

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