It's funny a freaking amazing the things I forget. Reading comments from my last entry I remember some of the strange shit that goes along with dating. I know most women thing its just on their side of the street. Like one of my friends got a request from an online guy for pictures of her feet. However as guys we get our fair share of weird shit to. Although it may just be me since none of my guy friends really say any of this kind of stuff. Since my mind has been jarred I'll try to remember a few gems from the last few years in no particular order.
- This just happened over the weekend and I forgot about it already. Why? You really need to hit a certain level of weirdness to register on my brain. I had a woman the other day in the midst of our emailing back and forth asked if I like to be spanked. I responded that no I didn't, but I would spank her if she wanted. No date. Can't please everyone.
- This one woman and I had moved to the point of talking on the phone after a few emails. Personally I hate this long drawn out process since nothing is really known until you meet. Anyway this time the phone did show something. Anyway we're talking about what we do. She was a big VP in a company. As we're talking she ask for my email address so she can send me something. Next thing I know I have a bunch of pictures in my email box. Pictures of her. Pictures of her with toys. Now I'm no prude in any sense of the word, but my brain does a transition time from normalcy to 70's porn music. Honestly I can't remember what I said but it was some kind of spanking joke to kind of balance the weird direction the conversation had taken. She became very offended and hung up on me. Hmm maybe there is a pattern here of me making a spanking comment and not getting a date.
- Actually this is the one that was sparked by the comments. Still in the email stage of the "relationship". This woman asked would I meet her in a parking lot, allow myself to be blindfolded, tied up, and driven someplace. I should have answered her yes if I wanted my body parts spread out over 5 states. My answer was no, but for the life of me I can't remember my wise ass crack cause this was just too fucked up a second or third email.
Now before you all think I'm a perv and hang out on adult sites. These were from normal places. You'd be surprised who you meet. How about you? Any freaky encounters with dating?
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12 people had cathartic therapy:
So many... my weirdest was the guy who asked me what kind of food I liked, then said "I want you to ravage me" in the next sentence. Then he somehow tracked down where I worked and tried to friend me on my work facebook account, which scared the crap out of me since he had only had my first name and city! Weirdo!
That is too hilarious, Mike. I never got any weird requests like that, but plenty of other weirdness:)
Ummmm....maybe you should try the "adult sites." I've met some great people there!
Just sayin.... :)
xoxo
~vk~
I think Vixen is right. At least on the adult sites, the sex and kink is out there in the open so you can sort accordingly. I have a theory that women who are more in tune with their sexuality are actually less crazy.
But its just a theory.
Oh gosh. If that is the first impression they want you to have of them, then they sound like trouble...
YAY if you're looking for trouble! :o)
I had an online profile with OkCupid and I wrote lots of "don't contact me if...." lines in it. Examples included if they had a pictures of themselves with shirt off, with their tongue hanging out or if they thought that they were good people. Or if they didn't have a pic.
One guy wrote me a beautiful email and I was tempted to relax my rules because he just came across as so great. But I did want a picture, so I asked him for one.
He sent me back a full page sized pciture of his cock, with his hand pumping it and the tagline "I'm handy".
I had a date with a guy I met off a dating website. First and only date - He took me to a local swingers bar. We're on the dance floor and all of a sudden he announces to me that he can't have sex with me that night because he's still hung up on his girlfriend. He ended up getting drunk and I had to find a ride home.
Consider yourself lucky you're actually talking with real people.
On one of the sites I joined, I sent lots of mails to different people only to get the same scam mails over and over again where they try to suck you into buying subscriptions for private intros (for people who aren't real anyway).
Very annoying for someone that actually wanted to meet people. I'd have been happy with a "go buzz off" or something... just to know I reached someone "real"
Wow that guy in the picture has a nice package, thanks for sharing !
Oh yes, back to the topic at hand.
One guy wanted to know if I would pee on him aka give him a golden shower.
No effing way ! Then he proceeded to tell me that he liked using his fleshlight.
Wierd, wierd man. Things did not go far at all.
Cat - it's never good when you some starts out with so many. Hmm food likes as foreplay. Interesting.
Blue - I'm surprised with all the characters you've dated over the years.
Vixen - Really? My experience has been that has been a whole NEW level of weirdness.
Jane - I do agree at least it would be in the open. I think it's still just a theory with them being less crazy.
Sweet - No, no, no more trouble. I've had enough of that.
Kitty - Sorry, but that's too funny. However I do see those qualifiers on woman's profiles. The new one is having all your teeth. Jeez what's the world coming to.
Diva - wow sad to hear. Reminds me of Facebook girl who got passed out drunk on me on our date.
John - It's true. You do get a sense for "those" profiles with some seasoning.
Senorita - Thanks now I have to look. Sounds like a pretty selfish guy. At least talk about what he's going to do to you.
Ahhh perhaps getting divorced would not be the best idea unless I plan to take a vow of celibacy! I have done the online chat thing and despite being open about being married and not looking for anything beyond a friendship, I have met some real odd people out there. Good luck.
You know, #1 and #2 make you look pretty strange, too. :)
But I'm gone if the conversation turned to sex before we even met. I am instantly able to decide if it is someone I will potentially sleep with, and I just don't want to discuss it in any way before I make that "okay, maybe" or "No way" decision.
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