Going Sane in a Crazy World

My journey through life and the lessons I learn to help me grow spiritually.

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I finally was able to shave off my moustache today. When I was younger I always wanted one. I tried to grow one when I was married, but that didn't go over well so I gave up. However as I got older my desires changed as they did in many areas. Facial hair of any type is no longer a desire of mine. I couldn't wait to get home to shave it off and see my old self in the mirror. I had to admit this was the thickest I've ever had it in my life.

The Halloween party went really well last night. 20 people showed up which was great. There was an over abundance of food which is a good thing unless your the host stuck with it when everyone leaves. I had prizes for the top 3 costume people. Silly stuff, but it went over well. It was nice to see new faces that I've never met before and the costumes didn't help. It was very nice to go with the Photographer. Who flowed around the room very well. It's still a momentary concern to hang with her which I got hammered in my head with my ex, but it was nice to flow out on my own and hang together at other times.

It was funny she thought I wasn't a touch feely type of guy since I shake the women's hands and don't really touch them. Working by myself and having mostly female clientele I don't do any hugs. So it does flow into my personal life, but also being the organizer of the group I want to make it a safe place for everyone. So talking about it she was surprised, pleasantly surprised that I am.

After the party we hung out at her place drinking tea, talking, and cuddling on the couch. We talked about sex and that we both needed time which made us both happy. By the time we finished on the couch it was 2 so the Photographer said I could stay over, but reiterated that we weren't having sex which I agreed. It was nice to really cuddle together and sleep which was something the Planner and I never did.

The Photographer was pleased to find out I don't snore and was surprised that I don't really move much while I sleep. Something I just have ingrained from sleeping on couches and cots during my teen years. The weirdest thing is I sleep so much better and am more relaxed when I'm with a woman. So this morning we were lazy in bed. Lying in each other's arm talking about our past. We bonded really well and it was nice to be intimate with someone who understood where I was coming from and visa versa.

We finally pried ourselves out of bed when she needed to get up and meet her son for lunch. Hopefully we can get together Tuesday night since she is leaving to photograph a wedding and will be gone for 5 days. This relationship feels different for me. It feels more solid, like when I work out a problem in myself and I get that whole feeling.

Went to visit my Mom today and do her nails. She is still not eating well which seems to be an insurmountable problem with her nowadays. She never said a word to me and didn't focus on me while I did her nails. She talked to my brother on the phone which she always seems to do. Afterwards she then focused on my somewhat, however talking still didn't happen.

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